&& I want life in every word, to the extent that it’s absurd

Funny how time && distance change you
the road you take don’t always lead you home
you can start a love with good intentions
then you look up and it’s gone.

Forgive
and forget. That’s what they say. It’s good advice, but it’s not very
practical. When someone hurts us, we want to hurt them back. When
someone wrongs us, we want to be right. Without forgiveness, old scores
are never settled… old wounds never heal. And the most we can hope for,
is that one day we’ll be lucky enough to forget.



It is better to be happy for a moment
and be burned up with beauty
than to live a long time
and be bored all the while.
– Helen Keller

Every new beginning
comes from some other beginnings end.

Be more concerned with your character than your reputation,
 because your character is what you really are,
while your reputation is merely what others think you are.
– John Wooden quotes



“What is that feeling when you’re driving away from people and they recede on the plain till you see their specks disappearing? – It’s the too-huge world vaulting us, and it’s goodbye. But we lean forward to the next crazy venture beneath the skies.”-On the Road, Jack Kerouac

“Promise me you’ll always remember: you’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” -Winne the Pooh

There comes a time when you look into the mirror and you realize that what you see is all that you will ever be. And then you accept it. Or you kill yourself. Or you stop looking in mirrors.– Tennessee Williams

Why do we trust one another so little? I know there must be a reason, but still I sometimes think it’s horrible that you find you can never really confide in people, even in those who are nearest to you.– Anne Frank

“Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.” – Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit


“Well we all shine on
Like the moon and the stars and the sun
Well we all shine on.”
– John Lennon,

I thought I knew what love
was What did I know?
Those days are gone forever,
I should just let them go.”

Good judgment comes from experience.
And often experience comes from bad judgment

“Someone else’s boy, I have hope for you,
That you will keep your love for the world,
Even though it beats you down, every day,
For the rest of your stay”

“People are afraid of themselves,
of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how
great love is, but that’s bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are
disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can
they deal with love if they’re afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us
up. People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong. Pain is something
to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of
pain. It’s all in how you carry it. That’s what matters. Pain is a
feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel
ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your
reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.”
-Jim Morrison

“There are things that used to make me laugh.. but now they’re deeply buried in the past. .. Remember when I said I loved you? Well, forget it, I take it back. I was just a stupid kid back then.”

I believe that everything happens for a reason.

People change so that you can learn to let go,

things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they’re right,

you believe less so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself,

and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together

Most cynics are really crushed romantics:

they’ve been hurt,  they’re sensitive,

and their cynicism is a shell that’s protecting this tiny,

dear part in them that’s still alive.

Remember not only to say
the right thing in the right
place, but far more difficult
still, to leave unsaid the wrong
thing at the tempting moment
-Benjamin Franklin

Staying home alone on a Friday. Flat on the floor looking back. On old love. Or lack thereof. After all the crushes are faded, and all my wishful thinking was wrong. I’m jaded. I hate it.

Yes, something’s wrong,
that restless feeling’s been preying on my mind.
When things get bad
I’m bound to pack my bags and just leave them all behind.

Though I know I won’t win
I’ll take this one on the chin,
we’ll raise a toast
and I’ll pretend I got something to believe in.

I don’t believe in destiny or the guiding hand of fate. I don’t believe in forever, or love as a mystical state. I don’t believe in the stars or the planets or angels watching from above. But I believe there’s a ghost of a chance we can find someone to love and make it last.

Some things don’t last forever, but some things do.
Like a good song, or a good book, or a good memory
you can take out and unfold in your darkest times,
pressing down on the corners and peering in close,
hoping you still recognize the person you see there.



And I wonder where these dreams go when the world gets in your way. What’s the point in all this screaming , no one’s listening anyway.

The more you change,
the less you feel

  People do not seem to realize that their opinion of the world
is also a confession of their character.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

You got to listen to the heavens,
you got to try to understand.
The greatness of their movement
is just as small as it is grand

it’s while you’re thinking,
while you’re sweating things out,
while you’re weighing the pros and cons,
 life goes on
passes you by while you’re doing nothing.

I suppose I do have one unembarresed passion in life:
I want to know how it feels to care about something passionately.

Destiny is something we’ve invented
because we can’t stand the fact that everything that happens is accidental.

And if you are ever going to have other people trust you,
you must feel that you can trust them too. Even when you are in the dark.
Even when you’re falling.




You get fired, and this is what you hear. You catch your girlfriend in bed with the guy next door, and this is her defense. You get shot in the face, and the nurse whispers it to you: ‘Everything happens for a reason.‘… Everything might happen for a reason, but it doesn’t have to be a good reason. It might be that the universe is chaotic or vengeful. It might be that it’s Tuesday. It might just be your turn.” – Stephan Talty

I’ve learned that life isn ‘t a movie.

Though it’s nice to believe in white-hatted heroes and black-hatted villains, 

people are alot more complex than that.

“No one feels another’s grief, no one can understand another’s joy. People imagine that they can reach one another. In reality, they only pass each other by.” – Franz Schubert

You grab her hand as I walk by, our glance becomes a stare,

the tension that remains with us is more than I can bear,

you cannot keep pretending that I mean nothing to you,

because I see it in your eyes and only eyes are true.

You can’t break my spirit, it’s my dreams you take.
& As you move on, remember me.
Remember us, and all we used to be.

I know your fears, and you know mine.
We had our doubts but now were fine.
&  I love you, I sware it’s true.
I cannot live without you.



I watch the sunlight dance across your face
& I’ve never been this swept away.

In a way I know my heart is waking up,
as all the walls come tumbling down.
Closer than I’ve ever felt before
I know & you know
There’s no need for words right now

I guess it’s time I run far, far away.
Find comfort in pain.
All pleasure’s the same
it just keeps me from trouble

I wish I could walk through the doors of my mind. Hold memory close at hand, help me understand the years. I wish I could choose between heaven and hell. I wish I would save my soul, I’m so cold from fear.

How do you let it go
when you just don’t know
what’s on the other side of the road?

You only hold me up like this
Cause you don’t know who I really am.

I know that I can’t make you stay,
but where’s your heart?

I am not afraid to keep on living, I am not afraid to walk this world alone. Honey if you stay you’ll be forgiven. Nothing you say can keep me from going on.

All around is anger, automatic guns. There’s death in large numbers. No respect for women, or our little ones. Tried talking to Jesus, but he just put me on hold. & Still this emptiness persists, perhaps this is as good as it gets, when you’ve given up the drink & those nasty cigaretes. Leavin the party, or at least with no regrets. Watchin the sun come up, or watchin it as it sets. Yeah, this is as good as it gets.

Though other’s have tried, I just can’t deny.
For me, you are the one.

True love is priceless,
for true love we pay the price.
But there’s nothing that can keep me from loving you.
Not fire, not ice.

All the people in your life who’ve come and gone
They let you down, you know they hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; cause life goes on
You keep carrin’ that anger, it’ll eat you up inside

There are only four questions of value in life. What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made of? What is worth living for? What is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same. Only love.



“If there’s any kind of magic in this world, it must be in the attempt of understanding someone, sharing something. I know, it’s almost impossible to succeed, but . . . who cares, really? The answer must be in the attempt.”
– Before Sunrise

“All our young lives we search for someone to love, someone to make us complete. We choose partners and change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope, all the while wondering if somewhere, somehow, someone perfect is searching for us.”
-The Wonder Years

Lyric’s

The Heart of the Matter by: India Arie
(a little bit of it)

I thought of all the bad luck,
And all the struggles we went through
How I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love’s open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?

I’ve been learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I’m learning them again
I’ve been tryin’ to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it’s about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don’t love me anymore

These times are so uncertain
There’s a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
And the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
They’re the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work they put between us,
You know it doesn’t keep us warm

Songs to Download
Goodbye my Lover – james blunt
Breath – Faith Hill
Not fire, not ice – Ben Harper
The Heart of the Matter – India Arie
Tears and Rain – James Blunt
Famous Last Words – My Chemical Romance

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Tell me that you need me, then you go & cut me down.

There’s just a couple things I’d like to know. Like how could you do nothing, and say, I’m doing my best? How could you take almost everything, and then come back for the rest? How could you beg me to stay, reach out your hands and plead, and then pack up your eyes and run away as soon as I agreed?

In the silence it became so very clear that you had long ago disappeared.
And I cursed myself for being surprised that this didn’t play like it did in my mind.

I am truly sorry about all this. I envy your ignorance.
I hear that it’s bliss.
And I wonder what of this will have meaning for you.
When you’ve left it all behind.
I guess I’ll even wonder if you meant it at the time.

I’m here without you baby, but you’re still with me in my dreams
&& tonight girl, it’s only you and me.

All at once you have to say goodbye.
Wondering, could you stay my love,
 will you wake up by my side?
No she can’t.
Cause shes gone, gone, gone.

People change,but so do
you. Sometimes for the best, and sometimes for the worst. Bad things
happen to everyone. You’re not in it alone. People lie, and some people
just dont care how you feel. Your heart beats, no matter how much pain
you’re in. Everything will be okay, eventually. There are always people
in your life that just make your day,no matter the miles. Dont tell me
its easy because its not- but it is worth it, I’d rather stay in touch
with the people I love; than just drop it and forget about it. You
forgive;but never forget, and you certanly dont forget about the ones
you love. It doesnt work like that. Give it all you’ve got, and live
your life to the fullest. People would kill to be you, have what you
have, someone always has it worse than you, but that doesnt mean your
pain doesn’t count.



So, is that what you call a getaway? Tell me what you got away with. Cause I’ve seen more spine in jellyfish. I’ve seen more guts in eleven-year-old kids.

How can you just walk away from me, when all i can do is watch you leave?
Cause we shared the laughter and the pain.
&& Even shared the tears.
You’re the only one who really knew me at all.
So take a look at me now. There’s just an empty space.
 && You coming back to me is against the odds,
&& that’s what I’ve got to face.

I think
everyone has a certain part of their lives where they truly wish they
could just freeze time. Whether it was three years ago, today, or still
to come, whether it was just a moment, a whole day, or a whole summer.
Everyone has a time in their life where they wish everything would just
stop. The world would stop turning & people would stop changing.
Because to them, at that time, everything was perfect.

I drive this ocean road & I remember
the small of your back, nape of your neck
I remember everything
As I drive,
Waving this town goodbye.

I don’t wana drag it out. Don’t wana bring you down.
I never wanted it to end this way.

Sometimes
things happen.
Things happen even when you don’t intend them to happen.

Maybe at the beginning you had good intentions
 or no intentions or intentions you thought were harmless.
But before you knew it, things got out of your control.

Often, too often,  things that
start out as just a normal part of your life at some point cross the
line to obsessive, compulsive, out of control. It’s the high we’re
chasing, the high that makes everything else fade away.

“As
if he’d never existed. What a stupid and impossible promise to make.
He
could steal my pictures and reclaim his gifts,
but that didn’t put
things  back the way they’d been before I’d met him,
I was changed,

my insides altered almost past the point of recognition.
It was a
promise that he could never keep,
 a promise that was broken as soon as
he’d made it.”
–New Moon.

I’ve come to my senses, that I’ve become senseless.
I could give you lessons on how to ruin your friendship.
Every last conviction, I smoked them all away.
I drank my frustrations down the drain, out of the way.
So I sit and wonder, “does anyone else feel like me?”
Someone so tired of their routines and disappearing self-esteems.

Theres a switch that gets hit, and it all stops making sense.
And in the middle of drinks, maybe the fifth or the sixth,
I’m completely alone at a table of friends.
And I feel nothing, I feel a terrible nothing.



I wana make love right now, now, now.
Wish we never broke up right now, now, now
We need to make up right now.

That was the day I stopped believing in love.
That kind of love. The love in books & films.
The love that tells us to abandon our lives & plans,
all for one brief touch of Venus. So often we fail
at that kind of love. The world just seems too fragile
a place for it. Perhaps it’s just that we are too fragile.

I changed the presets in my truck so those old songs dont come up.
Yeah, they still find me, and remind me.
Yeah, you come back that easy.

I sort of smiled when he didnt talk to me today.
Maybe, just maybe, someone besides you can keep me on my toes.

I took her hand and said baby listen
For every moment you waste,
there’s another right behind it to take it’s place
Cause life goes on when it ain’t so sweet
Don’t give up on it
Get back on your feet
You can take another breath you gon’ be okay
Just smile, forget yesterday
-shwayze

But more importantly, you are a gift to all who know you, whether or
not they realize it. If they don’t, they are blind. You have a special
place in this world. All you have to do is find it. Do not give up on
yourself, on the truths you have realized. Do not give in to those who
would crush your dreams like nutshells. And never turn away from
forever love.
-Burned by Ellen Hopkins

It’s the love that doesn’t ome easily that we want the most.
It’s the obsession, the passion.
That’s why we want what we can’t have,
the easy things and people don’t seem as desirable,
even though usually they can be just as great.

Used
to say that staring into your eyes felt like home,
but you were like no
home I had ever known.
You were soft and lovely,
 and you always kept me
warm.
I miss having someone to wrap me up in their arms.

Distant look grows in your eye, but fools never ask, afraid of what lurks in your mind. I always knew, somehow, always knew, I always knew the truth. At least I can say I was not afraid. I loved you all the way, I’d pick the fool any day.

Maybe in five or ten yours and mine will meet again
Straighten this whole thing out
Maybe then honesty need not be feared as a friend or an enemy
This is the distance
And this is my game face
-Vienna

“Maybe that’s just growing up. When you’re young, you tell yourself
things like, ‘well if it didn’t work out, it wasn’t meant to be,’ as if
that actually meant something just because it sounds like it does. I
think you can say something like that so blithely because you expect to
stumble onto something else just as wonderful just around the next bend
in the road. But people are rare, unique things and just because
everyone really does live a life full of farewells, doesn’t mean you
shouldn’t at least realize waht it really means to say goodbye to
something that meant everything. Just because you will survive and get
over it, doesn’t mean you should let it go.”
-Adam Duritz

You’re smile, just captured me.
& you were in my future as far as I could see.
I never even had a chance you know.
You had me from hello.

Inside I built a wall so high around my heart I thought it’d never fall.
One touch, you broke it down.
The bricks of my defenses,
scattered on the ground.

Could you whisper in my ear

The things you wanna feel

I’ll give you anything

To feel it comin’

Sorry for the trouble that I put you and your heart through.
God knows that I’d do anything for a part two.

I know they like to beat ya down a lot, please don’t cry, dry your eyes, never let up. Forgive but don’t forget, girl keep your head up.& when he tells you you ain’t nuttin don’t believe him,&if he can’t learn to love you you should leave him. Cause sista you don’t need him. –tupac

Said leave me to lay, but touch me deep,
I don’t sleep, I dream.
I’ll settle for a cup of coffee
but you know what I really need.

People are fragile things.
You should know by now, be careful what you put them through. People are fragile things, you should know by now, you’ll speak when you’re spoken to.

Your face it doesn’t look like it did. You want only to never get lonely, so you opened up your arms and took me in. And this our last goodbye, and this is a perfect lie told by someone that I used to know back then.

Your face it dances, & it haunts me
laughter still ringing in my ears
I still find pieces of your presence here
even after all these years

And I’ll do anything you ever

Dreamed to be complete

Little pieces of the nothing that fall

May put your arms around me

What you feel is what you are

And what you are is beautiful

“Don’t be afraid.” I murmured. “We belong together.” I was abruptly overwhelmed by the truth of my own words. This moment was so  perfect,
so right, there was no way to doubt it, his arms wrapped around me,
holding me against him. It felt like every nerve ending in my body was
a live wire. “Forever.” He agreed.
-twilight

I
wish that I held your words more dearly,
 like they were the last words
I would ever hear. T
hese are the memories that will not escape me.
 Oh,
and your smile is worth a million charming words.
I wish to be lost in
your arms.

Perfection
is defined when your heart beats next to mine,
and time stands still
for us.
My hand in your hair, and yours on my chest.
Moments with you
are my life’s best.

Maybe it’s me who’s this unstable, always obsessed about the end. Why can’t I let what happens happen, and just enjoy the time I spend? Oh how I wish it was so easy, but when there is no point to anything, You know it can get a bit confusing. Why is that I keep going? Why is that we keep going?

Set me free, leave me be.
I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity. Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I’m supposed to be. But you’re on to me and all over me.

This
song becomes our anthem as we sing it in your car. Am I that itch
beneath your skin? That alcohol you have been drowning in? The one that
aches for a century, the one that wastes your year? The one that you
still call love? Your radio is on tonight, so sing it if you’re still
alive. If you’re still alive. If you’re there at all sing da da da. I
still feel joy when I wake and when I breathe. If the world falls
around you, I will still feel joy.

I still feel you here.
I don’t think you’re memory will ever fade.

I let you see a side of me that I don’t share with anyone.
Promises are only words unless they are fufilled.

A boken heart is not what I wanted from this, but i guess I learned from it. But arent you supposed to learn from your mistakes? I don’t consider this a mistake, I just wish it didn’t end this way. Cause I’m still in love with the one that helped me write it.

This is nothing new, this is nothing new.
You are slipping through my fingers & into the airwaves
The static’s where you’ll find me.

I
remember thinking to myself, so, this is the beginning of happiness.

This is where it starts. And of course there will always be more.
It
never occurred to me it wasn’t the beginning.
 It was happiness. It was
the moment. Right then.

I’ve made mistakes in my life. I’ve let people take advantage of me & accepted way less than I deserve. But, I have learned from my bad choices & even though there are some things I can never get back and people who will never be sorry, I’ll know better next time and I won’t settle for anything less than I deserve.

Oh I wish I could just say no
& get you out of my heart
it must be nice to have some place to go
when your world falls apart.

If you gave me back all those years
I’d do it all better I swear
Time won’t let me go

You were everything I wanted
Then you left me broken hearted
Now you don’t mean a thing to me
All I wanted was your
Love,love,love

I think it was me, it must have been me. I guess I did something wrong. Tried to hard, wanted to much, guess that’s he’s gone. Lost my pride, fought & cried, I felt like a little kid. What’s wrong with me? I still can’t believe I did the things I did. I couldn’t change him, he was gonna break my heart, I saw it comin’ yeah I knew it from the start.

Guys like him are like the wind, & you know it’s just too bad. They blow in && out again, and never know what they had. Girl, I can tell you he’ll do the same to someone else. It aint about you, don’t be so hard on yourself.

Friendship marks a life even more deeply than love.
Love risks degenerating into obsession,
friendship is never anything but sharing.
-Elie Wiesel

You always admire what you really don’t understand.
 -Eleanor Roosevelt

Friends can help each other.
 A true friend is someone who lets you have total freedom
to be yourself-and especially to feel. Or, not feel.
Whatever you happen to be feeling
at the moment is fine with them.
That’s what real love amounts to,
letting a person be what he really is.
-Jim Morrison

Each generation wants
new symbols,
new people,
new names.
They want to divorce themselves from their predecessors
–Jim Morrison

Until the philosophy which holds one race superior and another inferior is finally and permanently discredited and abandoned, everywhere is war and until there are no longer first-class and second-class citizens of any nation, until the color of a man’s skin is of no more significance than the color of his eyes. And until the basic human rights are equally guaranteed to all without regard to race, there is war. And until that day, the dream of lasting peace, world citizenship, rule of international morality, will remain but a fleeting illusion to be pursued, but never attained… now everywhere is war. -Bob Marley

Sometimes there’s so much beauty in the world I feel like I can’t take it,
like my heart’s going to cave in.
-american beauty

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