One day, his name just didn’t make me smile anymore.

“All that we are is the result of what we have thought.
The mind is everything. What we think, we become.”
-Buddha

It seems to me I wake up and sleep, look in the mirror and have no idea what happened inbetween. But I remember counting days down til the year could be done, so I could scatter all my notebooks on the prep-school lawn, and disappear again into the summer’s bliss of staying out, sleeping in, and getting drunk with my friends. But that’s gone, and I know it won’t ever come back. I accept, I won’t cling to what I had in the past. But life’s a slippery slope, regrets the steepest hill. Hope for the best, plan for the worst, and maybe wind up somewhere in the middle.
loose leaves – bright eyes



I’ve got this picture in my mind of how we should be.
It wouldn’t take long to show you, come along with me.
I’d give you the sunset, if you’d give me your hand.
It wouldn’t take long to show you, please understand.




Memories come and go like a dream lost in the night.
But I remember everything about you,
and how you came and changed my life.

I lost myself in who I thought you were.
I found myself on the floor alone.


In your life you meet people. Some you never think about again. Some you wonder what happened to them. There are some that you wonder if they ever think about you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again; but you do.

Smile. Smile. Stay a while.


Do you remember the time when you and I were fine? Hiding under the apple tree there was no one but you and me, we would hide from passing cars and we would have the summer stars. And we were better then, then we’d ever been before. You came back to me after walking out my door, you would call me on the phone before you even got home, and without me you said you were all alone.

She walks just like I remember, like something’s on her mind.
She said that she would still remember when everything was fine.
I wish everything was fine.


But at a certain point the memory of him stopped accompanying me everywhere I went. He stayed behind, the way a city stays behind as a train pulls out of the station. It’s there, somewhere behind you, and you could go back and make sure of it. But why should you?

I wish we were those foolish kids, we could go back and start again.
We always knew this night would come, but I could never give you up.


And instead of saying all of your goodbyes –
let them know you realize that life goes fast,
It’s hard to make the good things last.
You realize the sun don’-go down,
It’s just an illusion caused by the world spinning round.


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What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?

Burning every bridge that I cross,
to find some beautiful place to get lost..

Should I give up? Or should I just keep chasin’ pavements.
Even if it leads nowhere. -Adele

That was the problem with having the answers.
It was only after you gave them that you realized
they sometimes weren’t what people wanted to hear.

I would of lied, could of cried, should of tried harder,
done anything to make you stay.

A man couldn’t tell from her beautiful smile and graceful manner that there was this immense layer of complexity and excitement. She hoped, that one day, a man would find her with a paper bag over her head, maybe then they’d see the real her. But for now, she hid under batting eyelashes and slender legs, just waiting for the one.

If you have ever loved someone once,
you have the capacity to love them again.
I wish you could believe this and come home.

You always thought that I was stronger.
I may have failed but I have loved you from the start.
Fall For You – Second Hand Serenade

“I do not have any other way of saying it.
I think it happens but once and only to the very young
when it feels like your skin could ignite
at the mere touch of another person.
You get to love like that but once.

There’s always going to be bad stuff out there. But here’s the amazing thing –
light trumps darkness, every time. You stick a candle into the dark,
but you can’t stick the dark into the light.

There’s no love like lost love, no pain like a broken heart.
There’s no love like you and me, and no loss like us apart.
Promise is, Promise is only a word, and when softly spoken
is never heard. && A heart is not a stone,
and is fragile when alone.
when alone.

It was one of those rare smiles with a quality of eternal reassurance in it, that you may come across four of five times in life. It faced-or seemed to face-the whole external world for an instant, and then concentrated on you with an irrestible prejudice in your favor. It understood you just so far as you wanted to be understood, believed in you as you would like to believe in yourself and assured you that it had precisely the impression of you that, at your best, you hoped to convey.”
-The Great Gatsby

“I learned very early in life that I was always
going to need people a little more than they needed me”
-Quentin Crisp

time takes it all.
whether you want it to or not, time takes it all away, time bares it away.
and in the end, there is only darkness. sometimes we find others in that darkness,
and sometimes we lose them there again

He had one of those faces on that only I could see straight through. I knew it all too well, the nervous blank stare he had when trying to act like he didn’t care. As he walked across the room I slowly realized I was the only one who even noticed. His presence was at a minimum to everyone but me, and that was the way it was always going to be.

Everyone is beautiful.

Just everyone doesn’t see it.

You look at me, I stare back. It’s one of those rare moments where we acknowledge each other exist, usually at least 4 drinks in. You don’t smile, you don’t shoot me a glare, just a short momentary blast from the past before you grab her and walk away.

Isnt that the beauty of tomorrow? The great and utter possibilities.
Isn’t that why we try to catch the unattainable,
love the unexplainable, for one more chance to believe a fable.

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Cause after all of the sparks you’re still alone in the dark.

1.Maybe when you smile
It means you’d stay awhile
Just maybe you’d save me now

2. And I got so backwards, trying to make myself matter to him. All this time, there were real things to care about: real, good people who care about me and this place. It’s so easy to get stuck.You just get caught up in being something, being special or cool of whatever, to the point where you don’t even know why you need it; you just think you do.

3. Just because I finally got over you, doesn’t mean there aren’t days when it all just comes rushing back.

4. How do you get that lonely?
How do you hurt that bad to make you make the call,
that having no life at all is better than the life you had?
How do you feel so empty that you want to let it all go?
How do you get that lonely, and nobody knows?

5. Is this a moment to remember or just
a cold day in December, I wonder
if maybe, maybe I could be
all you ever dreamed

6. Man it takes a silly girl to lie about the dreams she has,
lord it takes a lonely one to wish that she had never dreamt at all.

7. Cause i just can’t believe the way that this
continues to go on. I say i wish you didn’t
always think i’m wrong. So tell me, tell me
what will it take to get this through your head,
and tell me what will it take
until you see things through from end to end.
Relient K – End to End

8. i’ll break my heart in two
more times than you could ever do
cause you’re my dream please come true

9. That’s what innocence is, you know. A blissful oblivion of what’s coming, of what
you’ll lose and what you’ll gain, and what kind of person you’ll grow up to be.
–Laura Weiss

10. At some point, you have to make a decision. Boundaries don’t keep other people out. They fence you in. Life is messy. That’s how we’re made. So, you can waste your lives drawing lines. Or you can live your life crossing them. But there are some lines… that are way too dangerous to cross.
-grey’s anatomy

11. The truth is… I gave my heart away a long time ago, my whole heart..and I never really got it back.
– Sweet Home Alabama

12. Stay and watch the stars come out and then the sun as they all fade away. I’ll
sing you every song I know if it will make you want to stay. And then I’ll say that
I missed you and these words, they’ll convince you to stay.

13. It occured to me that you won’t be hanging around
I guess it don’t matter cause you always put me down
But I never thought I’d see you on the ground
And you’re supposed to save me?

14. I never knew perfection ’till I heard you speak, and now it kills me just to hear you say the simple things. Now waking up is hard to do and sleeping is impossible too. Everything is reminding me of you. What can I do?

15. I’ve seen your act & I know all the facts.
I’m still in love with who I wish you were.
It aint hard to see who you are underneath,
but I’m still in love with who I wish you were.
-Kate Voegele

16. I had always thought of myself as aware and thoughtful
but it had occured to me that most people believed this of themselves.
Even as they cheated on their lovers and averted their eyes from the homeless.
You could ask a wife beater if he was a good person and he’d probably say yes

17. Sunny days seem to hurt the most, I wear the pain like a heavy coat,
I feel you everywhere I go.
I see your smile, I see your face, I hear you laughin in the rain.
I still can’t believe your gone.

18. Going back to the corner where I first saw you,
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag I’m not gonna move,
Got some words on cardboard got your picture in my hand,
Saying if you see this girl can you tell her where I am,
Some try to hand me money they don’t understand,
I’m not…broke I’m just a broken hearted man,
I know it makes no sense, but what else can I do,
How can I move on when I’m still in love with you
-the scriptt

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I’m too fly to be depressed.

There were times when he caught me,
but more times when he let me fall,
and in finally came time for me to learn that
I could pick myself up off the ground and walk away.

We used to belive in a lot of things,
like forevers, and our dreams.
We used to speak of our futures,
but then we both went our seperate ways,
and now we don’t talk about those things anymore..
In fact, we don’t talk at all.

I don’t want to see you anymore, I’m just not that strong.
I love it when you’re here, but I’m better when you’re gone

I’ve seen fire and I’ve seen rain.
I’ve seen sunny days that I thought would never end.
I’ve seen lonely times when I could not find a friend,
but I always thought that I’d see you again.

I miss you every day, and life just hasn’t been the same
since you’ve been gone.
And althought it’s been almost a year and a half,
I still don’t understand.

My theory was that if I stopped talking to you,
maybe you’d start to miss me.
But my theory failed and now it’s worse,
because now we don’t talk at all.

It’s rediculous, it’s been months and for some reason
I just can’t get over us. & I’m stronger that this
No more walkin round with my head down.
I’m so over being blue & Cryin’ over you.

Songs of the day:
Go On Girl – Ne Yo
Wish You Were – Kate Voegele
Everything I’m Not – The Veronicas
Clouds – Mayday Parade
99 Red Balloons – Nena
Hey Stephen – Taylor Swift
Gravity – Sara Bareilles

Rap/Hip-Hop
Screwed Up – Trae ft. Lil Wayne
Yes – Lil Wayne ft. Pharrel

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